this is so unfair!

How can it be that a girl like me gets freaked out when a boy she really cares about says "I like you a lot" "I like you" "you are beautiful" "you mean a lot to me".... is that not what every girl desires to hear?..
I want to hear all of those things but why do they scare me and make me want to run the other way when someone I care about SO much says them?
Is it because I have heard them before and then been screwed over by the ones that said it? Is it because I am afraid I will get too used to hearing those words and then one day them not mean anything? How unfair is this??
I want to believe that this is Satan just trying to destroy something beautiful- I mean, it makes sense right?..
I care about this guy so much and he makes me so happy- so why is there still something not right yet?
We are taking things very very slowly.. so I should have nothing to be afraid of..

I just for once wish that I could be totally at peace
happy and
care free!

Do I just need to stop worrying and let things roll the way they are?
Or do we need to have a sit down chat and figure this all out?

How stupid do I feel~
"Um sorry babe- It scares me when you tell me that you like me and I mean a lot to you"

My entire mind is telling me to delete this post right now so that he doesn't see it and I just "sweep it under the rug" like I ALWAYS do....
but I have to be honest with him and let him know these things. Don't they always say that, "communication is key"
Sigh.

I feel that this may be a huge part of my trust issue showing up..in a BIG way.
serious prayer is in order.

well... that's all for now..